deercountry inbox.

[measuringdicks]

welcome to the trench chapter of interdimensional hostage bullshit anonymous! unfortunately no one can come to the phone right now because we’re being fucked over by the multiverse again, so leave a message after the beep. we’ll get back to you if we’re still here.

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Comments

[measuringdicks]

[All that—actually makes him feel a hell of a lot better, really. That note about Deerington is a bit concerning, okay, but otherwise this is the kind of advice Richie needed to hear. Eddie is his best friend, and he's been devoted to him since...eh, basically forever. So long as he keeps sight of that, they'll be okay.]

he makes me happy too
always has
nothing gets me going more than making him laugh it's like winning the fucking lottery right there

it's cornier than a corn field in Iowa
but you're not wrong
I'm still terrified of fucking it up bc I don't always think shit through before saying it (sur-fucking-prise) but
we've known each other since we were seven and he has heard all my best and worst jokes and lived through the time I thought I could be a ventriloquist and the time we nearly got eaten by an evil clown monster so

it's just
you know
I never actually thought this would happen
at all
this is brand new territory for me

cool join the club
I'm trying not to make a joke about how big my dick is just to feel more normal since we're being sincere about our feelings and all
but it is
fucking
killing
me
not making it

[tagartist]

yeah
i get it
the first time max told me she was into me, i had a full blown panic attack, because i thought she was either pulling one over on me or that she was just in my head and i was hearing what i wanted to instead of it actually being a like. reality.
i think i threw up on her shoes
it was very romantic
anyway it's new for him too, right?
so you guys can figure your shit out together
just like you always have

make a big dick joke, we'll both feel better

[measuringdicks]

funnily enough I almost puked on Eddie's bedroom floor
the only thing that stopped me was Eddie shoving me in his bathroom's direction so you know it was all very romantic and shit
I would've thought it was a joke?
except I know Eddie and there's shit he wouldn't really joke about

yeah he also freaked out about it I think he wasn't entirely planning it either???
he didn't barf though!
very proud of him

okay okay
if you say it like that how could I resist
my dick is so big that ten states classified it as a deadly weapon bc they thought I shoved a rifle in my pants